The Struggle of Working During and After Cancer Diagnosis and Treatment

Cancer is a draining, time consuming disease. There is the emotional toll of having a potentially fatal disease. There are seemingly endless doctors appointments. There are operations. There is chemo and radiation, and constantly feeling sick and tired.

Now imagine having to work while going through all of that. Seems insurmountable, doesn't it? Thanks to a group called Careers and Cancer, it isn't.

Careers and Cancer's mission statement is "Cancer and Careers empowers and educates people with cancer to thrive in their workplace, by providing expert advice, interactive tools and educational events."

They have identified key issues: "As the number of cancer survivors in the U.S. continues to grow, there is an increasing need for resources and support to help them get back to everyday life and work after diagnosis and treatment."

• 44% of people newly diagnosed in 2014 were working age.
• Cancer survivors are more likely to be unemployed.
• 20% of cancer survivors still report work limitations affected by cancer-related problems 1–5 years after diagnosis.
• 922 cancer discrimination claims were received by the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission in 2015.

According to a study conducted in 2015, the majority of cancer survivors and people with cancer are eager to continue working but need support to balance their health and work demands.

The survey further identified the top three reasons people continue to work after a cancer diagnosis:

• 69% need to work for financial reasons
•  53% currently feel well enough
• 44% want to keep things as normal as possible

 Here is what Careers and Cancer is doing to help empowers and educates people with cancer to thrive in the workplace:

• 325,000+ individuals access expert information, support and resources online, in print and in person annually
• 69,000+ publications were distributed in English & in Spanish in 2015
• 98% of 2015 program attendees said they can use what they learned in their day-to-day activities
• 3/4 of surveyed healthcare pros are initiating conversations with patients about the impact of cancer on work more frequently than they did before attending the 2014 Educational Series
• 465+ job-hunting survivors have had their resumes reviewed free of charge since 2013
• $87,714 in travel grants have brought 141 scholarships recipients from 35 states to the National Conference since 2-14

"Our innovative programs for survivors and healthcare professionals provide the vital support, tools, and information they need to navigate the practical and legal challenges that follow a diagnosis."

The next National Conference will be held on June 17, 2016 at The Graduate Center at CUNY, in New York City. And it's FREE! For more information, or to register, visit Careers and Cancer National Conference 2016.

 For more information about Careers and Cancer, and how they can help you, visit Careers and Cancer.

Guest Blog Post - Erica

I met Erica at Cervivor School San Diego. At the time, I had no idea how close we would come, and how much her friendship would mean to me. Erica is a very vocal, passionate advocate for cervical cancer awareness and prevention. I am incredibly honored to call her my friend. For more of Erica's story, visit her blog at http://www.tealelfs.com/index.html.

Erica and her son Wylee

I live my life everyday with cancer.  I try to live each day with purpose, make the right choices, and lead a fulfilling life.  Does this mean I always make the best choices? Absolutely not.  While reading a book, The Earth Dwellers, I came across a quote which really spoke to me:
Although there are hundreds of shades of gray between right and wrong and good and evil, in the end it comes down to a single choice: to care or not. To care about humanity, about the pains and fears and sorrows of others, or to ignore them, to look the other way, to say “it doesn’t concern me.” I know I haven’t always made the right choices, but I hope I haven’t chosen completely wrong either, and in the end, we all die. But we don’t die equal. Not even close.

This quote is so important to the way I live my life.  It really puts into perspective that our choices matter.  Along with my cancer diagnosis there has always been a choice for me.  I could not speak out, not share my story OR I could speak out, share my story, and potentially save a life.  I could potentially save the life of someone who might not have normally gone for a well woman’s exam.  I could save the life of a child by speaking out to parents about the importance of the HPV vaccine.  This quote reminds us that we all have a choice about how to live our lives.  We can choose to care about humanity, in my case I have a goal of helping humanity by sharing my story and spreading cervical cancer awareness.  Or we can choose to look the other way when things get difficult and think “it doesn’t concern me”.  As the quote goes, “in the end, we all die.  But we don’t die equal.  Not even close.”
I hope that when I die my son is proud to say that his Mom has made a difference in the lives of others.

Living Life

My Stirrup Story

What you are about to read is graphic at some points. But as it is a true story, it has been told completely as is, in the need for full disclosur.

When I was 19, a bouncer in a club raped me. I blamed myself – I was dressed provocatively, I was drunk. Many people would have said I was “asking for it” and that’s what I thought at the time. It was years before I could see that I had not been “asking” to be raped.

Rape creates ripples. It affected every aspect of my life, especially major issues with intimacy. But until I was diagnosed with cervical cancer, I didn’t realize that the most detrimental effect being raped would have on my life was my avoidance of cervical cancer screening and pelvic exams. I could barely handle intercourse – there was no way I was going to let a doctor, a relative stranger, insert a speculum into my vagina. The idea of having that device inserted and widened inside me seemed like being violated all over again. After I was raped I stopped going to the gynecologist. I did not have a Pap test until I was 34 – 15 years after I was raped.

I went into therapy to deal with my crippling anxiety. I was diagnosed with PTSD. Not too long after, I started having periodic excruciating pelvic pain. I saw a whole host of doctors – my general practitioner and two gastroenterologists - but never a gynecologist – I still wasn’t ready for the invasiveness of a speculum. But none of the doctors I saw had any answers. I was finally convinced that I needed to see a gynecologist which meant I had no choice but to face my biggest fear – unwanted penetration into my vagina by a foreign object.

The day came for my appointment I’d made with a gynecologist.  I lay on the table and my gynecologist began inserting the speculum. She did not explain what she was doing during the exam. She probably assumed that I was just another patient who’d had many pelvic exams before. I was too ashamed of being raped to tell her how scared I was of having a speculum, or even her fingers, inserted into my vagina. My body tensed, I couldn’t relax my legs. I broke out in a full body sweat, and I began to hyperventilate. I couldn’t get rid of the image and the feeling of the rapist holding me down and ramming his body into mine, I felt like he was in the room with me and I was being violently raped all over again. I couldn’t stop crying, tears streamed  down my face. When the exam was finally done, I was shaking all over. I was so relieved but the worst part was yet to come. That visit to a gynecologist diagnosed me with cervical cancer. 

When you have cervical cancer, your vagina is constantly being examined, be it with a speculum, or just your doctor’s fingers. And this is hard. There are flashbacks – it’s like being violated all over again, even though the exams are for healing purposes and not to defile. I still have panic attacks: sweating, elevated pulse, hyperventilating, and my whole body still tenses. I’ve been so fortunate that my oncologist is incredibly kind, and as gentle as possible when examining me. He explains the exam step by step, and moves slowly and lightly. And with time, I have been able to separate the violation of rape from the healing touch of my doctor. It still isn’t easy, but my health is the most important thing. And I am proud of myself for my willingness to overcome my past trauma in order to face my fears. I want women to know that nobody deserves to be raped. Nobody deserves HPV or cervical cancer. You did not ask for this. You just need to listen to your body, get screened, and remember that you are never alone.

 I am a rape survivor. I am a cervical cancer survivor. I AM A SURVIVOR.

Cervivor Presnts Stirrup Storis: Narratives Beyond the Speculum

Thursday May 12 was a truly epic event. Tamika Felder,

Chief Visionary of Cervivor (http://cervivor.org/a, a non profit for women dealing with HPV and cervical cancer, as well as their famiies; gathered a group of Cervivor sisters to perform monologues at the Howard theater in Washington DC to share our stories dealing with persistent HPV and cervical cancer. It was truly an epic event. So many of us came together to share our experiences. What could have been a maudlin event was actually a celebration of strength, courage, and yes, joy and affirmation. I was truly honored and humbled to be a part in such and amazing event.

I admit, I was beyond nervous at the thought of getting up in a room full of strangers, and sharing  a very traumatic experience from my past that definitely impacted the was that I avoided seeing a gynecologist. But the time I did manage to make an appointment, I already had cervical cancer.

Telling my story was incredibly difficult. Fortunately, I was surrounded by my Cervivor sisters, whose support is invaluable. And afterwards, I had multiple women approach me to share their own stories of sexual assault, and how it had negatively impacted their lives. But what I hard, over and over again, was that I am not alone. These women, these strangers, truly gave me a gift - a hug, a word of encouragement, a comment on my bravery, when I did not feel brave at all.

My next post will be my monologue, so you can  fully grasp the idea of what happened to me, and how I had such a hard time of taking care of my gynecological health for many years.

Each of the stories told that night moved me beyond words. Some stories I had heard before, others were new to me. But the best thing about Cervivor is that we are here for each other. It really is a sisterhood. Tamika always says that together, we have two shouldrs to lean on, and that makes all the difference.

It was an incredible night, and despite my fear of baring my soul to a room full of strangers, I am glad that I did. Sexual assault has a tendency to instilled fear when it comes to gynecologists visits. But our health is th most important thing, and we need to stay up to date on our pelvic and well woman exams. The best is when you are able to find a doctor who goes slowly, gently, and explains the procedures step by step. If you find yourself in the same situation, remember IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT, and that there are groups and that ther are people there to help.

Overall, Stirrup Stories was a huge success. We were able to reach a lot of people, and allow them to put a real, normal face to the disease. It was honestly a night of celebration, and it was a beautiful thing to behold.

I am beyond grateful for my Cervivor sistrs, and their continuing, unwavering support. I love you all so dearly.

xoxoxoxo