The Cervical Cancer Sorority: But I Didn't Even Rush!

Yesterday I heard a story from a fellow cervical cancer warrior about a conversation she had been in about HPV and cervical cancer. The conversation was centered on women who were saying that their cervical cancer was not HPV related.

I’ve been in these conversations myself, and I hate them. I find them to be horrible, because we should be supporting each other, no matter where our cancer came from. I also think it’s slut-shaming – since HPV is considered an STI, to “brag” about getting cervical cancer another way is, to me, the same as saying “I’m better than you.”

Well guess what ladies? We’re all better than our cancer.

The CDC estimates that HPV causes 90% of cervical cancers. I’ve heard that number be estimated as high as 99%. So even if the number is 90%, I’ve heard a lot more than 10% of the women I know with cervical cancer claiming to not have had HPV EVER. And considering friends and groups I belong to, the number of women I know with cervical cancer is in the thousands. The numbers just don’t add up. According to the CDC, around 79 million people in this country have HPV, and about 14 million people become infected each year. Livescience.com suggests “more than two-thirds of healthy Americans have a human papillomavirus (HPV) infection on some part of their body.”

Now there are two forms of cervical cancer that currently show no link to HPV: small and large cell cervical cancer (SCCC and LCCC respectively). These generally show no warning signs, but sometimes show the same symptoms as HPV-related cervical cancer: vaginal bleeding, vaginal discharge, and bleeding after intercourse.

Out of approximately 11,000 new cases of cervical cancer diagnosed each year, around 100 cases will be either SCCC and/or LCCC. At less than 0.01%, there is just not information known about these two forms of cervical cancer to determine the cause.

So I’ve given you a lot of facts about what causes cervical cancer, percentages involving HPV and SCCC and LCCC, and that’s great. But that is not the point of this post.

I’ll say it again. THAT IS NOT THE POINT OF THIS POST.

I want to circle back to what I said before: We’re all better than our cancer.

My case of cervical cancer was caused by HPV, an STI. I’m not ashamed of that. Chances are more than likely yours was caused by HPV too, and you shouldn’t be ashamed either. But I understand if you are, I really do. I was too, in the beginning. It took a lot for me to put myself out there and say, “I have an STI and it led to cervical cancer.” The reason I was able to let go of my shame and put myself out there was because I had a ton of women supporting me, telling me it’s not my fault, and that there is no shame. And I want to tell that to you. I want you to believe me. I know it’s hard, but it’s the truth. You have nothing to be ashamed of.

As women, we have so many things that we apologize for. I’m sorry for not being a better mom, wife, employee. I’m sorry I’m not thinner, or sexier, or fashionable. I’m sorry I’ve slept with X number of men, because we all know that when a woman has a number higher than 3, she’s a slut. But if a man has a number higher than10, he’s a stud.

I read a great article by Danielle Sepulveres recently about how we as women should lift each other up,The Thirst Is Real. We shouldn’t resist complimenting each other, or empowering each other, and we should definitely not criticize each other for having HPV-caused cervical cancer or not. When you have cancer, you need all the help you can get. As a friend likes to say, we each have two shoulders; that’s a lot of shoulders to lean on.

We are women with a disease that carries a stigma: only sluts get this type of cancer. That is simply not true. We are daughters, mothers, grandmothers, friends. We are gay and we are straight. We are virgins and we’ve not been (and it’s not your business how many partners I’ve had). We are rich and poor; we come from all races, religions, and backgrounds. We are a sisterhood we never wanted to join. Our colors are teal and white.

Please ladies, let’s not lose sight of the fact that we are all battling the same dragon: cervical cancer. It does not matter how we got it; we did not choose it. Let’s support each other in our fight to end it rather than grouping ourselves into HPV versus non-HPV. The end result didn’t matter – we are all sick, and we all need support. And the best support we can get is from one another, as no one knows the agony of cervical cancer in all its awful glory better than we do.

xoxo Jennie